Thursday, March 6, 2014

Moshe's Divrei Preida (Eulogy)

בס"ד    
Israel thoughts

Due to the lack of time I'll speak in English and summarize briefly in Hebrew.  Thank you all for coming out even though it's not an easy hour to say the least. 
בגלל השעה אדבר באנגלית ואתמצת בעברית. דבר ראשון תודה רבה לכולכם שטרחתם להגיע למרות שזו שעה לא פשוטה.
1)      There's a pasuk in Zecharya that can be loosely translated to say the following "I will give you the ability to walk among those that are standing". While the simple meaning of the pasuk places the angels at a higher level, on a deeper level, there is a reference to an advantage we have over the angels, we have the ability to walk, move, and improve ourselves, while angels are static and stuck in one place.  One of the things that most impressed me about my father was his constant motion and yearning to improve.  He was not fortunate enough to have a quality and expensive yeshiva education, like the one he provided for his children, but he was constantly striving to learn more and progress in learning.  Although he started learning at a relatively late stage, recently he was able to replace the magid shiur in daf yomi when needed.  My father was fond of changing siddurim every so often, so that he could improve his tfila by learning a new perspective. In terms of working on his midot, my father was world class, my parents have a library of self help and mussar books that rivals the Library of Congress, and in many different parameters, such as dealing with his personal mourning and anger management my father was able to greatly progress over the years.  He had such a tremendous ability to forgive others, at this point I'm not even able to comprehend how he did it, much less emulate him. 
הפסוק בזכריה אומר "ונתתי לך מהלכים בין העומדים האלה". פסוק זה רומז ליתרון שיש לנו לעומת המלאכים, הם עומדים במקום ואילו אנחנו מסוגלים להתקדם ולשפר את עצמנו. למדתי מאבא שלי מה זה יכולת להתקדם בלימוד תורה, גם אם אין לך רקע תורני, ולמדתי מה זה תיקון מידות והיכולת לשפר את עצמך, גם בגיל מבוגר.
2)      The sweetness of Torah-  In the morning prayers we ask that Hashem make the Torah sweet for us, which seems to be quite an unusual request. We have the Torah, we learn it and that's it, why does it have to be sweet?  It seems that Chazal realized that in order for the Torah to be the cornerstone of our lives it has to be sweet for us.  In the introduction to his book, the Iglei Tal emphasizes this point and says that the main mitzvah of learning Torah is when you learn Torah due to your love for it, and that's the way to truly connect to Hashem.  That is one of the things I really got from my father as did my sisters B"H.  I have vivid memories of my father walking around the house in his bathrobe early Shabbos mornings.  Since at that point he was davening at Chabad he had many hours of "free time" on those mornings.  He would use it for learning, although there were other leisure activities available.  When my great-grandfather was living in LA, my father used to go learn with him on Sunday mornings, and I still remember going with him occasionally, even though I was very young.  He showed me by example what a Torah Jew does with his free time.  My father got tremendous enjoyment out of learning with us and made that a priority in his lives and our lives as well.  He was fond of the statement in Chazal that once Torah is firmly seated in 3 generations that insures the prominence of Torah in that family for future generations as well, and got no greater joy than hearing about Torah related accomplishments of his various grandchildren.
אנחנו למדנו מאבא שלי מה זה אהבת התורה והשקעה בתורה. אחד הדברים החשובים ביותר בעיניו, אם לא החשוב ביותר, היה העברת מסר זה לנו, והוא רווה הרבה נחת מהעובדה שכולנו דתיים ומסורים לתורה ומצוות.
3)      Spiritual Medicine- One of the famous traits of Yosef hatzaddik was that Hashem's name was always on his lips.  Nechama Leibowitz z"l presents an analysis of the psukim showing that Yosef did such a good job of putting Hashem center stage, that he even got Pharoah, a renowned idol worshipper, to talk about Hashem as the one who runs the world. My 7 year old daughter Noa was lamenting that Saba Daniel passed away, commenting that he was such a good doctor who helped her so much.  As a kid I must admit I didn't feel the same way.  My father's solution to everything was "Tehillim and Tylenol" in that order.  Even though I found it frustrating then,  I'm sure that my father's constant focus on Hashem being the boss, it's all "etzba Hashem", learning to accept Hashem's will etc. etc., has helped mold me as a spiritual and committed Jew.  Even though these have been tremendously difficult times, I hope and pray that we will internalize his tremendous emuna in Hashem and use these nisyonot as a growing experience.
אבא שלי היה רופא, אך תמיד שם את ה' במרכז כרופא כל בשר וממנו למדנו איך לראות את אצבע ה' בכל מקום.  אני מקוה שהפנמנו את החומר היטב וזה יאפשר לנו לצלוח תקופה קשה זו ואף לצמוח ממנה.
4)      Commitment to Family:  Off the top of my head I can think of many examples how my father put family first.  As a kid I never really understood why my father would return home so early while my friends' fathers would be coming home much later.  Only when I matured did I realize that by coming home early, my father made a clear statement that significant time with his family was much more important to him than his career or making more money. My father was not a sports fan, and it really bothered him that athletes, many of them not such tzadikim, earned so much money for just playing a game. Nevertheless, he was always gathering sports related information from patients, so that he could relate to me, as a rabid young sports fan, and as a kid we had a weekly minhag to go out and get a copy of Sports Illustrated, even though I assume he would have recommended other reading material. Even though there was a language barrier between him and my younger kids, he worked hard to find a way to connect to each of them. The example he set has left a strong imprint on me and had great influence on the career choices I made and how I conduct myself in my profession as a psychologist.  I often find myself meeting with parents of challenging kids, urging them to get the fathers more involved, I'm sure part of that has to do with my feeling that I'm a better person because of my father's significant presence in my life.  Yesterday one of my kids needed some Abba time so we went out for falafel; I was a little uncomfortable doing so on the night before my father's funeral, but Racheli told me that Abba would definitely approve of that decision; I think that story pretty much sums up the great importance my father placed on family, and the great effect it's had on each of us.
מאבא שלי למדתי מה זה מסירות למען המשפחה וזה השפיע עלי גם בבחירת מסלול מקצועי וגם בהחלטות מקצועיות כפסיכולוג. כשאני יושב עם הורים ומנגס' להם שהאבא יהיה יותר משמעותי בחיי הילדים, אני בטוח שחלק מזה זה בגלל הרושם האדיר שהנוכחות של אבא שלי בחיי הטביעה בי

I hope that we can all continue to learn from my Abba as a very special man.  Not so much by preaching, but by personal example he taught us what it means to live a life dedicated to Hashem and family.

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